News

New things are bound to happen in a new year, and one thing to avoid when it comes to relationship are gossipers. Blessing Ukemena writes on how doing away with such people could enhance relationship.

Gossip is unconstrained and often derogatory conversation about other people, and can involve betraying a confidence and spreading sensitive information or hurtful judgements. Research shows that people who gossip the most have very high levels of anxiety.

They are generally not particularly popular, because they cannot be trusted. Spreading private information or negative judgements is painful to others, and reflects poorly on the gossiper. Gossip has been known to destroy relationships time and again. In the new year, it is best to focus on developing one’s self and ignoring matters that are not  related to us.

Olufemi Joseph, a single guy who resides in the FCT, told LEADERSHIP SUNDAY that he was once in a beautiful relationship with a lady three years ago called Hannah. They were both undergraduates in the University of Abuja, and they had met in school. They later broke up because his friends had said somethings that were untrue about her. He had gotten angry and left her, and refused to listen to her pleas.

Till today, he still regrets his action as he was yet to find another love like hers and would gladly marry her today if she agrees. He still kept contact with her even when she was engaged to be married to someone else. Some would say that men do not gossip, but rather discuss other people. Gossiping is gossiping, no matter how it is described.Both men and women gossip.

Why people gossip
Certainly, there are a lot of reasons people gossip and they include:
To Feel Superior: People who don’t feel good about themselves temporarily feel better when they judge others negatively.

Out Of Boredom: When people can’t generate interesting discussions, based on knowledge or ideas, gossip can rouse people’s interest.

Out Of Envy: People gossip in order to hurt those whose popularity, talents, or lifestyle they envy.

To Feel Like Part Of The Group: People gossip to feel as though they belong to the group. Yet, when acceptance is based on being “in on a secret,” it is not based on a person’s identity, but on exclusion or maliciousness.

For Attention: A person gets to be the centre of attention temporarily while divulging a piece of gossip. Yet, spreading gossip or rumours is like buying attention; it’s temporary and has little foundation.

Out Of Anger Or Unhappiness: A person can derive a sense of retribution with disparaging remarks.

It is wrong to always talk about others
There are times when we cannot just help hearing a little juicy tale of what happened to somebody, but you have been dying to meet up close and personal. Most people have a natural curiosity about what’s going on among people in the community.

Some of the best books are biographies that tell the life stories of other people. They are not based on one-sided, offensive judgements of the person. Gossip, especially as it concerns relationships, is negative.

What to do? In any case, when you happen to walk into a gossip group, do the following:

1. Firstly, you need to be prepared  not to participate in gossip in any shape or form. This means not being the first person to introduce a new gossip topic, and it also means not adding fuel to the fire, by joining in  any gossip. This can be hard as we are surrounded by lots of gossip, but take one day at a time, and soon, it will become easier. Make it clear to others that you will not participate in gossip and that you don't want to listen to any gossip. This can be scary, as gossip is often a (unhealthy) way of bonding friendships and groups. Be courageous and stand your ground. Don't be a willing participant.

2. It’s best to simply change the subject. If they were talking about Jane for example, here are some other possible responses:“I notice that you talk about Jane a lot. I’m curious why she interests you so much?” “Let’s take a look at it from Jane’s side.” “I am more interested in what you are up to.” “Let’s talk about something more positive or decide what we’re going to do this afternoon.”

“I feel uncomfortable listening to negative judgements about people, unless we figure out how to help them.”

In conclusion, gossiping shows others the gossiper’s insecurity and meanspiritedness. It also leaves everyone involved feeling as though they’ve just eaten a bad apple.

Ultimately, the right insight into the intricacies of human relations and behaviour is more interesting, uplifting, and enlightening than one-dimensional judgements and rumours. In case it's one of your habits, make a decision to change it this new year. So, have a refreshing and gossip-free new year.

Do you know that the most beautiful place to spend your leisure is in a garden? A well decorated garden, with beautiful flowers, enhances the quality of air that circulates in the environment.

Gardens are usually situated in a serene environment and encircled with both scented and beautiful flowers, basically for relaxation after the hard day's work.

Due to the aesthetic nature of gardens, they are used for different occasions such as birthday, wedding, child dedication, burial and other social events.

Before creating a garden, one should consider the soil texture available in that particular location. Apart from the soil texture, you should also consider the availability of water in the area, because for the garden to look charming, it must be watered regularly.

You must also consider the type of flowers and plants to cultivate that will hardly breed mosquitoes, and at the same time, attract patronage from customers.

Maintaining The Garden
It is very essential to water the garden at least twice daily, preferably morning and night so as to prevent the plants from withering.

Always consult a horticulturist for the maintenance, since it’s their area of specialty. However, the plants should be treated with insecticides to prevent pests and insects from eating up or destroying the flowers which may likely shrivel.

Give attention to the flowers and plants by trimming them at least once a month so as to retain that beautiful and charming looks.

Do not dispose hot liquids or foods on the flowers. It withers immediately just like vegetables.

Do not play with sharp objects or spray harmful chemicals that are not meant for plants, in order to increase the lifespan.

Onion can serve as ornamental, vegetable, spice or medicine. It’s good for vegetarians.

It is effective for curing many bacterial infections including bacillus subtilis, salmonella, and E. coli.

Onion is not as potent as garlic, since the sulfur compound in onion is only about one-quarter the level found in garlic. There are many different varieties of onion such as red, yellow, white and green. The species has both mild and strong flavour. Onion can be eaten raw, cooked, fried, dried or roasted. It is commonly used in salads, soups, pastries and other dishes.

Health Benefits Of Onions
According to healthdiaries.com, onion fights bacterial and urinary tract infections.

During World War II, the swap vapours of onion paste were used to reduce the pain as well as accelerating the healing of soldiers' wounds.

The high content of iron in onion makes it beneficial for the treatment of anemia.

Just by eating half a medium raw onion daily can significantly lower cholesterol and help prevent heart attacks.

The anti-inflammatory agents in onion are useful in reducing the symptoms of inflammatory conditions such as arthritis and gout.

Onions help to lower blood pressure naturally. It also thins the blood, dissolves blood clots and clears the blood of unhealthy fats.

It helps to reduce the risk of tumours developing in the colon.

Add plenty onions in your cooking as it helps to relieve chronic constipation and flatulence.

Chromium in onion helps diabetic cells respond appropriately by bringing down the insulin level and improving the glucose tolerance.

Studies revealed that by applying onion juice on the scalp twice a week for two months will enhance hair growth.

The pungency increases blood circulation and causes sweating. It is useful in cold weather to ward off infection, reduce fever and sweat out colds and flu.

Mix equal amounts of onion juice and honey. Take 3-4 teaspoons of this mixture daily. It helps dissolve mucus and prevents its further formation.  It is also one of the best preventive mixtures against common cold.

President Goodluck Jonathan will on Thursday inaugurate a professional Code of Conduct for the Nigeria Police Force, Inspector General of Police, Mr Mohammed Abubabar, has said. Abubakar announced this yesterday while hosting newly promoted junior offi...

Last year mass flooding in Kogi State and others on the coastline was not caused by the dredging of the Lower Niger River, the managing director of the National Inland Waterways Authority (NIWA), Arch.Ahmed Yar’Adua,has said. He told LEADERSHIP S...

A block of four flats located along Demonstration Road in Gwagwalada, a satellite town in the Federal Capital Territory (FCT), was on Saturday razed down by fire.

A News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) Correspondent who witnessed the incident reports that efforts by men of the FCT Fire Service to put out the fire which started at about 10 a.m. was abortive. Some occupants of the flat who spoke to NAN blamed the cause of the fire on one of the occupants whom they alleged left her cooker on.

The suspected, occupant however, denied the allegation, saying that she had not even opened her kitchen when the fire broke out. ``I had not even opened my kitchen this morning.

I just went across the road to buy chicken and met the house on fire on my return. ``My little baby would have been in the fire if not that I carried him with me,'' Ifeoma Amadi, the occupant, said in tears One of the occupants, simply identified as Augustus, was said to have travelled to Enugu this morning to attend his sisters` burial.

While other occupants of the building were seen salvaging a few property from their flats, everything in Augustus` room was burnt as access could not be gained into his apartment. Meanwhile, Mr Ignatius Amadi, the Caretaker of the block of flats, said that the fire started from the mattress of one of the occupants.

He alleged that the occupant may have left her phone on her mattress while charging it, adding that there may have been electricity spark somewhere.

The house, which according him, was the major source of income to the owner, was completely razed with properties worth millions of Naira. Some of the occupants of the flats said that besides their property that were burnt in the inferno, there were other valuable documents including certificates and cash. (NAN)